Today I did something so stupid I am embarrassed to discuss it. But discuss it I shall - full disclosure I say! I woke at around 5 to the relentless cacophony of roosters, then dogs, then people… So many sounds so early in the morning! I ate a banana, had my coffee and read a bit. Before long I decided that what I wanted to do was take a long walk. So, I packed my bag and headed down the road. I thought it might be fun to try and walk to the ocean - its about 10 miles, Id guess. Well, of course a white ‘americano’ walking down the street on a Sunday morning attracts a lot of attention. Everyone asking me, “Hey Joe, where you going?” Joe, by the way is what they call us americans. It hails from WWII, GI Joe and all that… Anyway… soon the temperature started climbing. I wasn't too worried since I packed water and there seemed to be intermittent stands along the road selling things.
After about two hours, I guess I’d walked about 7 or so miles past endless rice paddies with farmers ankle deep in water working the rows of rice in the same way its been done for countless centuries I am sure and anyway, my water was out… and I was hot, sweaty and thirsty. Time to check out one of those stands, right? Well, thats just what I did. I saw a stand that had a bunch of coca-cola bottles with some blue liquid in them and some other food stuff. I went up to the counter and pulled out my water bottle and pointed to it. There was a man sitting next to the coke bottles and he pulled out a bottle and handed it to me. I paid my 30 pesos, opened the bottle and took a long swig of……. gasoline!!! Now, I completely understand how this was so stupid of me on so many levels it is hard to fathom, but thats exactly what I did. The man nearly jumped out of his chair! ‘Gasoline! Gasoline!’ He’s yelling and looking at me wide eyed! Well, gas doesn't taste very good so I spit out what was left in my mouth and a woman runs over with some water which I HAD to drink! Now, understand that drinking local water around here is just about as dangerous as drinking gasoline, but what was I to do? I drank a few sips and then swished the rest around and around in my mouth before spitting it out. They seemed very concerned that I wasn't about to die on them, but before too long, feeling quite embarrassed, I headed off down the road. They just stood there, staring at me utter disbelief. In retrospect, I have to imagine that I was the first Joe they had seen walking down that road in a very long time… surely, I had run out of gas! Why else would anyone be walking down an endless road in the blazing sun, dripping in sweat and pointing to an empty bottle? The whole thing is just so comical, I have to laugh out loud but wow, so dumb! You just cant get that sort of entertainment on TV, folks!
Well, I went along about 1/4 mile further before I decided to sit down in the shade next to a couple of guys who happened to be there on the side of the road. Unsure of the effects of a downed dose of gasoline, and knowing that I was certainly dehydrated and still very very hot, I figured it might be prudent for me to end my excursion and look into hailing a motorbike back to Lagonoy. So, I did. I never got to see the ocean and I have been burping gasoline for the past three hours. Aside from some wicked diarrhea (caused from the gas or water, I am not certain), I seem to be ok but Im taking it slow for the rest of the day. I dont want to call the PCMO over this because that will likely lead to an administrative headache with symptoms far worse than what I am experiencing now. Well, wasn't THAT an adventure?!! I guess its time to hand wash a bit of laundry…
Wow! Glad you're OK!
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